We’re awesome because our people are. Fact.

25 years experience of marketing, research and planning combined with wrinkle free skin and youthful exuberance results in Ian often being mistaken for a very smart intern. Clients clap before he even starts his debriefs and he is so good looking that people often faint in his presence. He wrote this bio himself.

With over 200 years experience, Simon joined The Sound from Cello where he was President of Cello USA and CEO of the Value Engineers US. With his English accent and silver fox hair he's known affectionately around the office as 'the old English man with grey hair'. Claims to have a limp from running marathons but we think it’s a war wound.

Lindsey is very serious and very organized and requested that this bio be written sensibly and in the style of a meeting agenda
1. Welcome to Lindsey
2. What do we know about Lindsey?
4. Where did 3 go?
3. Oh there it is

Brynn has worked at The Sound since the very beginning. She has seen us grow from 2 people to nearly 50, she's seen us win multiple awards, she's seen our documentaries air on TV, she's seen us open 6 offices around the world and yet still she refuses to fully obey Ian Pierpoint (her mentor and source of spiritual guidance). If she wasn't very clever she would have been fired some time ago.

Dave is an award winning editor and ex drummer of the band SNFU. He dropped out of college, has never worn a suit and has lots of tattoos. When you enter 'Generation X stereotype' into Google he comes up just before Kurt Cobain.

Kim loves drawing and sketching and designing. She's so visual that she'll never bother reading this so there's no point in coming up with anything witty.

Every year we take all of our staff away for a week in the sunshine to say thanks for being awesome. The person who gets most 'tired and emotional' wins a trophy. That trophy is called the Juan Carlos Cup.

Professionally trained as an interior designer, Marissa has absolutely no interest in research, branding or planning. Most days she sits around looking confused before popping out to get some plants, candles and white chiffon drapes. Our office looks like J Lo's dressing room.

David's real name is David Cats but in 1987 he changed the spelling to attract chicks. He has not looked back since.

Caroline is our lady on the ground in Toronto. With nearly 10 years experience of research and planning gained as a client she still spends all of her days in meetings regardless of whether we actually have any meetings going on.

Colleen, Colleen, Colleen, Colleen
I'm begging you please don't take my man
Colleen, Colleen, Colleen, Colleen
Please don't take him just because you can

Kelli has spent her career working in both qualitative research (where she did some awesome groups exploring cat ownership) and the less fabulous world of advertising (where she won some boring awards and went to supposedly fancy places). Having spent time on both sides of the research mirror she is equally concerned about how both her face and the back of her head look.

After 12 years experience on the client-side Cheryl firmly believes that partnership is a one-way street of unreasonable demands, faint praise and delayed payment. Her husband has not smiled since 1997.

Jesse is a small town boy who spent his formative years rummaging around in lakes looking at pond life. This lead to degrees in Chemistry, Environmental Science and a strong desire to conduct focus groups. He still wears waders and smells of fish.

Brian is the 19th person with a beard to join The Sound. Unlike the 18 others, who simply adopted facial hair pour la mode, Brian was recently released from a secure unit where he was not allowed access to razors. He specializes in deprivation techniques and can out stare any respondent.

Being both arty and organized, Alexis loves to manage Chicago projects with a crafty flourish. Don't be surprised to receive an artisanal focus group schedule and hand made screener with a bird on it.

John Broderick is affectionately known as the 'housewives favorite' and charms both clients and respondents alike with his brilliant mind, easy manner and silky soft hands. He can make anyone do anything.

Harjot has more than 10 years' experience of organizing stuff. She can read minds, see through walls, eats light, and sh*ts magic. She was invented in a lab in 1947.

Cara prefers the joys of yesterday to the horrors of tomorrow; she is a lover of all things vintage. Cara refuses to employ any of our digital tools, treats the telephone with suspicious wonder, and prefers to knit her discussion guides. In her spare time she protests against the Crimean war, lobbies for the impeachment of Nixon, and suffers terribly from measles.

Eider was initially attracted to The Sound because of the 'clever writing style' of this very website. Such refined taste and appreciation of prose is rare in someone so incredibly beautiful.

I wish my parents had called me Iggy. With a name like that you're bound to become a rock god (or a project manager arranging logistics for multi methodology based and complex international research studies)

At just 4 years old, Kelly is officially the youngest person ever to work at The Sound. The photo you're looking at is what she actually looks like right now.

Alaina keeps the NYC office shipshape and in Bristol fashion. What does that mean, you ask? Well, it means she is fully aware that 'If everything is not stowed away tidily, or tied down, the results are chaotic and cargo could be spoiled.'

Greg lives his life according to the latest from Big Data. He knows exactly what he's doing, what he's bought, where he's been, and even where he's probably going to go next...but he has absolutely no idea why. His facial expression is a combination of hugely smug and massively confused.

Like a contradictory respondent in a focus group who loves something one minute and then claims to hate it the next, Stuart's beard is a completely different color to his hair. As an experienced researcher Stuart has no issues navigating and interpreting hirsute dissonance.

Youthful Helen joined The Sound having previously enjoyed 3 years of conducting research for youth focused brands. So youthful is Helen, that aging gentlemen pay good money to bathe in her blood in a misguided quest for eternal youth. She is quite pale as a result.

Laura has the 6th sense; she sees respondents even when there are only people in the room. When she looks you firmly in the eye you're literally seconds from being in a focus group.

The Sound's robot is a very naughty nuanced logo. Some days he represents a future full of hope fuelled by technological advance, while others he reminds us that human intuition and complexity are best understood by humans. Even our logo is smart and never boring.

Difficult to write a bio for someone who's surname is kind of like knickers without referencing underwear. But that would make The Sound seem immature, silly and smutty. And that would be wrong.

Le dimos el trabajo a Miguel porque nos dijo que era fluido en español y un investigador con experiencia hispanica. Si no puede leer esto, lo vamos a correr.

Matthew joined our fast growing Vancouver film team and to make room for him in the office we've finally had to get rid of the ping pong table. We hate him.

The Sounds film team is strangely made up exclusively of men, all working together in a hot dark room, playing obscure music and arguing about science fiction plots and sub-plots. Why no woman would want to join is beyond us.

Vlad imputes financial information. This means we get to call him Vlad the Imputer.

Raya has requested her bio be turned into an infographic by one of our 5 designers who spend all day making our reports all beautiful and visual. Given they're quite busy she's going to have to wait a while.

Did you know that in one state in India, police officers are given a pay increase for a having a moustache? And in Bengal cows have to have a photo ID card? And that sex toys are illegal in India? Aili knows all this, and more.

Drug fuelled dirty fingered singer song writer Pete Doherty wrote a song called 'What Katie did Next'. If he was writing about our Katie (as opposed to Kate Moss) the chorus would have been something like, 'Katie joined The Sound because she wants to work with amazing clients in a culture that's creative, inspiring and entrepreneurial'.

Ali is a project manager dealing solely with project logistics. Ali believes that specialization of labour occurs when workers are assigned specific tasks within a production process. She knows workers will require less training to be an efficient worker. Therefore, she believes, this will lead to an increase in labour productivity and increased efficiency.

The secret of great design is to keep things simple. This is Alice.

Contemporary offices have things like free food, exercise spaces, sleeping pods and lectures by the worlds greatest thinkers. At The Sound we try and emulate this but with almost no budget allocated for doing so. Danielle is who we blame for our London office not being as nice as Google's.

Check out the jobs below for openings!

Jim joined The Sound because he also believes that there is nothing more brilliant than a simple yet beautiful answer that is easily understood and embraced. To that end, this is Jim.

If you ask young people how they're feeling right now do you know what the most common answer is? It's 'I am bored'. Given the Sound's mantra is that everything we do must be Smart as F*ck and Never Boring, McKenzie should not be feeling bored at The Sound. To check, ask McKenzie how she's feeling right now by clicking here.

As Head of HR it is important to be thinking about recruitment, retention, culture, training and things like that. Its not important to waste time reading other staff Bios on our website. Shannon please be assured that all the other bios on this site are very serious and none of them reference improper conduct.

When people join the Sound one of the first things they get excited about is their bio on this website. Well Sophie was no exception. Sophie was so excited about her bio that she kept asking and asking and asking for it to be written. Well creativity, like insights or strategy, doesn't just arrive by magic. You need to be informed, inspired and in the mood... or the outputs might be a bit boring. We don't do boring at The Sound. Sophie knows that now.

Matt Palmer is pure liquid strategy. If he was in a band they'd be called the Strategists. If he was painting it would say 'strategy' when you looked at it. If he was a bio the word strategy would come up 5 times. Strategy.

Do you know how many people The Sound hired in 2015? Nearly 20 people. Thats 20 new 'engaging and informative' bios that have to be written. Sometimes I had to write 2 or 3 a month and, frankly, it's exhausting. So I complained and asked them to slow down with the hiring and do you know how many f*cks they gave that I'm having to write more bios than ever before? No f*cks. Anyway, this is Michael and apparently he makes films.

Princess Clea started at The Sound as an intern and after she thwarted the sinister Sith Lord Darth Vader we took her on as a Senior Associate. She is based in our Alderaan office.

If you want to understand love, then speak to someone who’s been recently dumped. If you want to understand the pains of contemporary life, talk to someone who lives off the grid. If you want to understand the importance of having a work bio that reflects your qualifications, experience and interests, talk to Priyanka.

A fan of behavioural economics, Peter spends his days worrying that he joined the Sound for all the wrong reasons.

Liz has travelled the world, is intellectual, well read and arty. If she were also pathetically immature and obsessed with robots she’d be the physical embodiment of The Sound.

Aashish claims to have the best beard at The Sound. Which begs the question, what makes a good beard? Is it a something easy to measure, like length or density or is it something more complex related to the associations or feelings the beard invokes? Get in touch with Aashish to find out more about beards.

India has a rich history of famous storytellers, many of which have been the inspiration to western rock stars, like the Beatles for example. Coldplay are currently stalking Barkha.

Like a good Sound Story, Natasha likes to make people think and be entertained at the same time, unlike this bio, which achieves neither.

Like one of The Sound Media films Mathew likes to provoke and tell it like it is. He thinks this bio is lame as shit.

Did you know that nous is a philosophical term related to intellect and the ability to determine what is real or not? I didn’t, until I started to write this bio. Megan probably knows all about nous (or does now anyway).

Sandy is part of the Vancouver team, but, strangely, is based many many miles away in Buffalo.
Which makes me sit and wonder, like, why?
Why you left me
Oh Sandy.
Oh Sandy, baby, someday
When high school is done
Somehow, someway
Our two worlds will be one

Melissa is officially the 100th person to join The Sound. You can now order limited edition Melissa Centennial Mugs and Tea Towels.

Jen runs our Chicago office and everyone really likes her, which is no surprise given that the meaning of Jen is literally ‘the cardinal Confucian virtue of benevolence to one's fellowmen’. Who knew?

Some people say that Gen X is the generation that marketing forgot. Well not Heather, she starts her day by watching Joanie Loves Chachi, reads Douglas Coupland on the way to work, only eats processed food and gives you a cynical withering stare if you mention that any of these things are like kind of weird.

Most people who work at The Sound have a beard. Now if I was a lazy bio writer I'd make a joke right now about how that's just the women. But I'm not lazy, and neither is Aaron, despite the fact he obviously can't be bothered to shave.

With the recent advent of fake news and alternative facts, I just realized that these bios are really ahead of the game; I've been writing fake bios for over 10 years. Anyway this is Sonja and she recently changed the spelling of her name from Sonya to appear more interesting.

Eve is a massive fan of behavioural science and to help her co-workers understand what mode she is in she's developed a thinking fast face and a thinking slow face. Get in touch by clicking here and ask her to send you picture of both, see if you can guess which is which.

Rebecca is a craft master. And her crafts are many and equally mastered. She’s a potterist, a sewerist, a ceramicist and an IKEAist. She’s also a brilliant researcher with a background in anthropology and digital ethnography but she doesn’t let that small detail outshine her ability to assemble a FÄRLÖV with her eyes closed.

With a background in Gender and Cultural studies and a taste for fine Japanese whiskey, it's only natural that Alice would be the magical mind behind Mammory Tapes, one of the most banging female-fronted disco nights in all of Londontown. And if there's one thing The Sound can never get enough of, it's mixing Cindy Lauper with a Suntory Hibiki on the rocks.

Simply put, Jeanne is a scholar. Not merely a scholar of journalism or marketing, in which she received her formal education. But a scholar of something even more critical to the human condition: She is a scholar of John Hughes films. Be it The Breakfast Club, Weird Science, or Pretty in Pink, Jeanne understands '80s-era midwestern American mythos better than anyone we've ever met. She even liked Mr. Mom. And that takes dedication.

The Sound's one and only yacht-rocker in residence, Issa is an accomplished mariner and a distinguished matelot. Which is to say ... the man knows his way around a sailboat. Starboard, portside, if you can name it, he's got a nautical knack for it. But it's not just knots that Issa is deft at untying. You should see him deconstruct a project brief. Aye Aye.